I got side tracked and didn't write last week so now I'm all out of sorts, with the rambling left overs of what I had planned to say floating just out of reach. Failing to write a few words once a week has made me even more impressed by my good friend Susie's wonderful blog which she has been writing every day for nearly a year; it's called "Why Today is Brilliant" and must take ages to research let alone write! As for me, I have been thinking a lot about how the creative urge can be captured, tamed and made to keep more sociable hours. I've had several interesting discussions lately about sleeping patterns and daily routines. It seems that many of the most creative people I know keep very strange hours and also struggle with periods of frustrating inertia when inspiration and motivation refuse to co-operate.To completely contradict myself, the most amazingly inspirational artist I know keeps very regular hours and has pretty much painted 9-5, 5 days a week, for the past 60 odd years, so it could just be that I lack gumption and good self discipline. Either way, I often find myself at my most productive late at night which, according to my brother would have made me a rubbish cave man.
These are the kind of things I muse on as I wander about lost in thought; often planning out a whole blog post in my head only to lose the thread before I can trap it. Last week I could have written pages on the overcoming of fear (I'd climbed up the scary rocks on Robinson alone and without my magic "sticky" trainers, celebrating with hot Ribena and feeling as intrepid as anything), I imagined a whole piece on the sensory delights of walking slowly, mindfully I suppose... the sounds of boots in sucking mud, half frozen grass crackling, metallic ringing of rock and shale, a thousand different water sounds, the smell of approaching rain ( do Cumbrians have 50 words for rain like the Inuits do for snow..?) .Anyway, that was last week; this week I slept like a bear, had no energy to walk except for my weekly volunteering at Calvert Trust and couldn't be roused before 10 - but I feel like I'm getting somewhere in the evenings. Listening to Pilgrim on BBCiPlayer I've been cobbling my stand design together for BCTF and embroidering notebooks, making velvet cushions, trying to work out how to display things and putting together a trade catalogue.
At times it feels ridiculous and self indulgent; the annoying devil on my shoulder ( sitting on the big pile of chips) keeps muttering about "real jobs", bills and pension plans but today I collected some card samples from Temporary Measure and I have to say they looked great, really professional and even I have to concede that I'm my own worst enemy. If only self confidence shouted as loudly as that little devil!
So there you go; despite a week in which I've felt incredibly lazy and unproductive because I got up late and didn't walk miles everyday, I've actually achieved quite a lot and this is the point... not everyone is a morning lark, not everyone fits in to the neat slots expected by the modern world and being an owl is nothing to be ashamed of so long as things get done. Which are you an owl or a lark?
Reading: Last weekend's newspapers and a knitting pattern. Listening to: Pilgrim, a radio drama by Sebastian Baczkiewicz
I've shut myself in the small room with the high window so as not to be distracted from writing to you; I can spend hours, lost in thought just looking out of the window at the birds or the mountains so I'm trying to be more disciplined this week.There's so much to do. I'm cozy under a blanket with a hot water bottle because it's freezing and blowing a gale outside... and inside actually, through every gap in the ancient stonework. This building never lets you forget it was a barn! Lately though there have been several perfect days when it hasn't rained and the snow on the mountain tops was pristine and dazzling; I love the way the snow highlights all the details of the fells and in different ways depending on the direction of the wind, it messes with perspective and distance too so that the same view is endlessly interesting. On a good day those mountains are almost as orange as my homemade marmalade with hints of dark chocolate and icing sugar...
I felt a bit bad after my last writing; someone pointed out (in a very kind and honest way) that I'd made "The Last of England" sound depressing and because I already felt a bit low it made me really sad and worried that I sound like Eeyore the entire time! It was an interesting discussion and at least two important things emerged, 1. Art in whatever form it takes, from painting to music and writing, is hugely personal and emotive which is why it's so important and vital to us as humans. The fact that a painting or a song can evoke diverse and often overwhelming, emotions (and often not those intended or felt by the artist) is pretty wonderful I think; “Music expresses that which cannot be put into words and that which cannot remain silent” 2. It's very easy to assume everyone knows what you're talking about and feels the same way. I've been writing this blog for 7 years now and I do forget that I'm not talking to an old friend over a cup of tea and a cake...some of you have been here from the start but some of you may have just stumbled through the door right now and have no idea who I am or what the backstory is, so you shuffle back out awkwardly refusing all offers of cake. I've always been aware of this but as BCTF approaches I decided I should reinstate my website at www.witchmountain.co.uk so that prospective buyers and stockists aren't confused (or put off) by occasional emotional outpourings about evictions, politics, creative block or the loneliness of a person in beautiful exile.I hope always to write honestly and openly though, I can't see the point if you sugar coat everything, delicious as that may be.
Well today I tried to re-photograph some things for Etsy and also for the trade catalogue which I'm currently putting together. It's been so dark lately that alot of my pictures had an unhealthy sodium yellow tint. Hurray for sunlight but not so hurray for the iPhone camera and an out of date browser (that can't be updated because my computer is old which is pretty disgusting built in obsolescence if you ask me). My plans and preparations continue with some fairly expensive mistakes ( a metre of velvet that didn't print properly and which I'd not left big enough seam margins on) and the realisation that if you want to present good , well finished work there is a high rate of wastage and "failure" initially. I remember reading about ceramicist Clare Humphry ,whose work I loved in the gallery, she says the results of firing are so unpredictable that only a small proportion of bowls came out as she had wanted and was happy with and this must be the same for many makers and artists. Quality control is a good thing...its just a shame it costs so much (and another reason why the value of a handmade object is so hard to put a price on)!
Anyway, it's time to tend to the stove now and possibly do a bit of jumping around to warm up and increase my woeful daily step count on my Fitbit. Sara and I both have one as we thought it would encourage us to get more active if we challenged each other... instead we are in denial, rarely reaching 10,ooo steps and still less able to resist toast and butter. I think music is the answer, I just discovered one of my favourite bands, Blue Aeroplanes, is still around after all so I'm off to play it loud and dance like nobody's watching (sorry cat) whilst waiting for some thick, fresh bread to toast...
Reading: "Murder on the Home Front" by Molly Lefebure ( who lived here ) lent to me by our rather lovely log man, Tim.Listening to: "Colour Me" and "Tolerance" Blue Aeroplanes . "Colour me with burnt sienna, show me where my heart is..." 
Yesterday was the anniversary of the momentous day when we finally said goodbye to North Yorkshire and, with a heavy heart, headed in to the unknown -Cumbria. Me and the cat journeyed West with the last of the moving boxes crammed into the trusty old Golf, and while Cat seemed quite content watching the windscreen wipers ( yes it was raining ) I was travelling with very mixed feelings...until we reached that magical stretch of the A66 when the mountains suddenly appear, all majestic and snow topped, telling me to snap out of it. Anyway, a year has passed, this picture has been on my mind "The Last of England" by Pre-Raphaelite, Ford Madox Brown, mostly because of the title and the sentiment- the look of massive resentment and resignation on their faces... I haven't set foot in North Yorkshire since but maybe it's time I did, to acclimatise before I go to Harrogate in April!
We have celebrated this weekend with a retro Black Forest Gateau, a trip to Cockermouth (more cake) and finally fixing the road to Grasmere ... sorry only kidding, just the jigsaw version which Rupert finished at last (it's kept him busy and driven him mad every weekend since Christmas). There is going to be a bus to Grasmere soon though, over a temporary bridge and I can't wait to visit again.
This morning after nailing up a new bird house and hanging up a selection of nuts and seeds to attract some feathery friends, I put all your names in a mug and asked Rupert to pick one... so the winner of my anniversary giveaway is Lucy McLaurin! Congratulations to you and thank you every one else for your comments. If you send me your address Lucy I'll go to the post office this week. I'll also be adding these new bear necklaces and some design samples to my Etsy shop later... I'd love to know what you think. The necklaces are a new and improved version of some I used to make a few years ago, these have sterling silver chains and findings and I've been doing rigorous testing (scrubbing with hot water, soap and a washing-up scourer) to make sure they're robust enough to be sent out in to the world.
Well, its a little chilly on this side of the room so I'm going to say goodbye for now and head over to the stove to have a think about more designs... perhaps Spring, Summer and Autumn to go with these wintery bears.
Reading: " The Illustrated Herdwick Shepherd" James Rebanks (for historical reasons I'm nervous about sheep farmers but I was given this for Christmas and it is actually quite lovely with some great thoughts on the landscape and education and the importance of "running free") Listening To: "Lost and Found" Steve Mason ( The video is filmed in Snowdonia but it reminds me so much of here and driving in the rain and certain times and friends from the past)